23 year old dating a 17 year old is plain wrong. i’m in my first year of uni and everyone i talk to already thinks it’s weird to date a 17 year old, or a high school senior. you’re living in two totally different worlds, and in order to meet a 17 year old, you’d have to make the conscious effort of going to high school parties, socialising with high schoolers, with people who are considerably younger and less experienced in life than you are. the entire concept is weird, and gross to everyone i know. it means actively seeking out people who are at an earlier stage of life than you, and it literally has no benefit unless you want people who are more inexperienced than you are. and that is of no use unless you 1. wanna be like a mentor to them, which is a weird thing to want in a romantic relationship or 2. you wanna exploit the fact they’re less experienced than you are, which is outright abusive.
i’m 18 now, and i already wouldn’t date a high school senior. by the time i’m 23, i’ll almost be done with med school. i wouldn’t even consider dating someone who’s in their first year of uni, because they’d still have their whole student life to look forward to, while at that time i’ll be ready to leave uni and get a job. you’re in totally different stages of life, you can’t relate. like i said, the only reason to date someone like that is if it’s a turn on to you that they know way less than you and you’re generally at a better place in life, with a better financial situation, more stability, more direction.
have you even watched the film/ read the book because i have no idea what you’re talking about. in cmbyn nobody is “seeking anyone out” and there’s nothing about high-schools or unis. elio’s family is far richer and more influential and if anything, elio definitely has less “problems” with his own sexuality than oliver.
cmbyn is about two people meeting by “the luck of the universe” and falling in love deeply. that’s the only concept there is. but after reading your answer trying to analyze and dissect the reasons why people actually want to be together with another person it seems that this concept is foreign to you…
abbys_little_whippersnapper 